Thursday, June 24, 2010

Love.


So this whole love soulmate thing really has me perplexed. For instance, I feel like I've found my soulmate, but over the years have realized maybe we don't have as much in common as I thought. But on the same side of things we make an excellent team! We take care of each other, we are here for each other, but why do I feel this way than?
I'm pretty sure we all know the answer to this one, NEW YORK CITY! Oh geez, I want to move there so bad I'm considering leaving my entire life behind to leave alone and start and new life alone. Start completely new! But I do have my doubts. Being in NYC this past May I realized that being in NYC without him sucks, so is it really worth it? I mean ya I had tons of distractions, made a ton of amazing friends, stayed up all night, slept in all day, did whatever I wanted to. I felt so free, but when I'd leave my adventures to go home alone, I wanted him there. I wanted him there to talk about my day with and to cuddle with at night. How selfish of me though, I wanted him there when the day was done, but during the day it was hard for me to even remember to call him. Im selfish. But I'm young so what can I even really say, I want what I want, but I can't have my cake and eat it too.
I feel like 23 year old me wants to put things on hold and just peace out, but 28 year old me keeps telling me this is what you want and what you need and if you leave it now you'll never get it back...I know I'm lucky, but I also know life is short and I need to live or 28 year old me will have a lot of regrets.